I am so down on myself right now. I feel as if I am at one of the lowest points of my life. I am completely overwhelmed. Last week I could hardly get out of bed. John came down on Friday and over the weekend we did do some tidying up. I have avoided everybody and everything for the past week. I feel anxious and nervous every time I think about having to do something. I look around the house and hear the kids fighting and feel like the world's biggest failure. Every day I want to do better and every day I feel like I am another step behind.
And my weight. Yep completely stress eating and hyper focused on fat. I am just under 90 kgs. Highest non pregnancy weight. Every night I vow not to binge the next day and every day I continue to binge.
The guilt and shame are ruling me right now. I hate that so much
No comments:
Post a Comment